


the commentator's sport

by notavodkashot



Series: Terms and Conditions Apply [8]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Gossiping is a royal pastime, Multi, and that someone is aulea, someone finally acknowledged the fact the reasons behind the promnyx con are fucked up, the promnyx shenanigans are basically cor's personal soap opera at this point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2019-06-23 16:05:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15609951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notavodkashot/pseuds/notavodkashot
Summary: Aulea comes back from a royal visit to Accordo to find Cor stuck watching the Argentum-Ulric marriage con like his personal soap opera and Regis actually doing something about it.Sort of.





	the commentator's sport

“…it  _is_ profoundly fucked up that our citizens are having to commit  _marriage fraud_  to survive, though,” Aulea said, running a brush through her hair as she sat on a corner of the bed, wearing an old t-shirt that once belonged to Regis and which looked enormous on her thin frame.

Ordinarily, she wouldn’t be caught dead wearing something like that. Mostly because Sylva would tan her hide and set it out to dry in the atrium. But Lady Aurum’s protocol ended right at the double doors into the inner sanctum of the King’s quarters, and so anything done and said there was strictly off record. Which honestly, was probably for the best.

“I mean you’re not wrong,” Cor murmured, lying as long as he was on the bed, squinting at his phone and the rapid fire messages filling up his screen. “But I’m not actually King, so not my job to unfuck this shit. I’m just in it for the entertainment value.”

“Fair enough,” Aulea said, nodding wisely, and then tilted her head and hollered at the bathroom, “Regis, are you unfucking your shit or what?”

“I’m doing  _what_ to my  _what_ now?” Regis wondered as he walked back into the room, wearing only nice, loose flannel pants that were soft and worn and nice, despite Cor’s eternal disdain for the fabric.

“I told her about Ulric’s drama,” Cor pointed out helpfully, shifting to sit up as he passed his phone to Aulea, so she could witness the glory of Nyx Ulric having a meltdown and giving Cor a play by play of it live via text and emojis.

“Oh,  _that_ clusterfuck,” Regis sighed, groaning when Aulea snickered. “Yes, I’m fixing it. The healthcare reform will be done by the end of the year, though the immigration piece is taking a bit of a toll what with the fact Iedolas will not sit down and sign the stupid ceasefire. He doesn’t even have to surrender! I just want him to stop being stupid, is that too much to ask for?”

“Why are these two not dating?” Aulea asked Cor, ignoring the way Regis flared his nostrils dramatically and dropped himself into bed with them. 

“Because they’re  _married_ ,” Cor told her, despairingly.

On her hand, his phone continued to vibrate angrily, marking each new message Nyx was sending, which amounted to existential dread.

“That’s not even the best part,” Regis snorted, and tugged at her to let him see the stream of Nyx’s carefully choreographed keysmash. “One of them happens to be Noctis’ best friend.”

Aulea stared.

“Does Noct know about this?” She asked, eyebrows arched.

“Nope,” Cor and Regis replied, in deadpan and a sigh, respectively.

“They did a really good job of their con,” Cor pointed out, eyebrows arched. “If I hadn’t been keeping close tabs on Prompto, I wouldn’t have noticed. They didn’t even tell their  _friends_.”

“And now they’re stuck, because they actually have feelings for one another, but they have no one to talk about it, except you,” Aulea guessed, blinking slowly.

“Pretty much,” Cor agreed, shrugging.

“I was gone  _six months_ ,” Aulea sighed, shaking her head. “Six months! How do you do this to yourself, every single time?”

Cor shrugged again, eloquent.

**Author's Note:**

> Come hang out on [DW](https://notavodkashot.dreamwidth.org/) or [Twitter](https://twitter.com/notavodkashot), if you'd like.


End file.
